Today, I spent the day with me, myself, and I and it felt great. What better company than the company of “oneself”. It was a care free day with no worries, just me – lost in my thoughts as I drove and took in all the beautiful things around me. It’s quite amazing what you can see when you just open your eyes…
I will never understand why some people don’t like being alone with themselves from time to time. Why not? Have you ever taken a day just for yourself to take a walk on the beach, lay under a tree, or pick flowers? Anything!? Try it, you will love spending time with yourself. What will you discover? Find out for yourself…
“In oneself lies the whole world and if you know how to look and learn, the door is there and the key is in your hand. Nobody on earth can give you either the key or the door to open, except yourself.”
&& what a fascinating world it is…take the time and you will discover what’s hidden deep inside.
My thoughts and prayers are with ALL in Boston today. Another senseless act of terror was committed and it’s heart breaking. When will we be able to come together as one and be at peace? I fear for my niece, nephews, god child, and the children of my loved ones and friends. They are growing up in a world full of anger and hate. Why, why why!? I fear of what’s to come if things don’t change.
I pray for a world full of love and laughter.
I pray for a world with no judgements.
I pray for a world with no hate.
I pray for a world where you are accepted regardless of color or race.
I pray for a world where we ALL can get along.
I shall not live in fear thinking about these senseless acts of terror nor should anyone else. Live your life to the fullest. Be kind to everyone you meet. Be less judging and more accepting. Don’t hate. Fill your heart with love. Forgive and forget. Life is too short.
I’ve learned that when something is eating me up inside that I have to face the issue head on. It’s not always the easiest questions to ask but I rather ask then stay with doubt. Doubt ruins everything…wouldn’t you agree?
There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up pleasant relations. It is a thorn that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that kills.
Today, I asked a dear friend some tough questions, I just needed to look into his eyes and get his reaction. It wasn’t easy, to be honest. I didn’t think about the consequences of knowing the truth. I didn’t care. I just needed to know even if that meant having my heart-broken. I rather be hurt by the truth than comforted by a lie because the truth hurts only once but a lie every time you remember it.
There is no room in my garden of orchids, for seeds of doubt.
It been months since I publish anything but every so often I get inspired to write a few words but then save it in my draft folder. It gets locked away in the vault of feelings and emotions that were felt but never spilled.
On March 24th, 2013 at 4:53pm I wrote the following:
It’s been a tough day to say to the least. I feel like my heart shattered into a million pieces. As I sat there and listened to what he was saying, I could not believe my ears. With every word uttered, a piece of my heart broke off, by the end of the conversation I was left feeling empty. It’s sad when you hear things about your life from a third-party. I know I shouldn’t believe everything I hear but the person who told me has nothing to gain by lying to me and I know the source. It’s not the first time I hear those things, it just hurts more every time.
It breaks my heart just re-reading my words. I guess you don’t need water to feel like you’re drowning. Something to think about…
I’ve never really thought about my fears. Who does? I’ve always figured I would comfort them head on when the time came. Today, I’m having an internal battle with my emotions about the one thing I fear the most. My heart. Perhaps, I should have been listening.
Fear, what is fear!? It’s simply a natural human emotion programmed in all of us as an instinct to potential danger. Is my heart in danger of breaking? What’s wrong with me!?
I’ve decided that all I can do is ride this wave of emotions and see where it takes me. I can’t help but over think every little detail and knowing that over thinking causes only negative thoughts I’m upset at myself. Why am I allowing the demons in my head to fill will me with fear? I guess, I just have to trust that everything will work out for the best and if it’s meant to be it will be. There is nothing more I can say because sometimes words are not enough.
Another draft just sitting in the vault of lost emotions: February 15, 2013 at 2:10pm.