When people expect you to love them a certain way…

A friend suggested the following discussion:  I’m having a dear abbey moment…

When people expect you to love them a certain way. For example, I show my love by giving gifts, or inviting people out for dinner, yet I have a friend that got upset at me recently because I didn’t hang out with her even though I gave her an extravagant gift. (are those 2 separate topics). I told her that you can’t expect people to love you the way you WANT them to but rather the only why that they know how.

Dear Friend,

Although the extravagant gift was a nice gesture your friend wanted your company more. Was it a special occasion? Birthday? If yes, than that’s why she was upset.  If no, maybe she just wanted some girl time. 😉  Gifts are fantastic but you have to remember that not everyone cares about material things. Sometimes its the small details that matter most.  ie. hanging out, a phone call, and sometimes a simple, thank you.

There is no right or wrong way to show love to anyone.  Love is a feeling that can’t be described, it can only be felt.  You show your love with gifts because that’s the way YOU are but not everyone is the same.  I know exactly how you and your friend have felt.  I’ve experienced both ends of a similar situation.  It’s only natural.  Think about a time where you expected something and it was the complete opposite.  How did you feel?  Upset? Disappointed? Hurt? (Not only in regards to showing love but in general.)  Are you thinking about it?…   It’s the same thing!

At the end of the day…

Your point is valid~ people can’t expect to be loved the way they want.  Your friend needs to accept you the way you are and know that just because you don’t love her the way she wants, it doesn’t mean you don’t love her with everything you got. Everyone is different!  That is what makes us unique~ 

No one is perfect and it’s simply human nature to expect to be treated a certain way, expect to be loved a certain way, expect, expect, expect — what we all need to learn is how to accept, accept, accept, people as they are!  Very to easy to say but hard to practice.

Hope your friend is no longer upset and will learn to accept you the way you are.

Don’t stress it.

Peace and Love xoxo






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