Do I tell…?

Let’s say you see your friend’s husband (lets call him David) with another woman, do you call your friend and tell her?   What would you do?  well…. What I know for sure, is that I wouldn’t tell her.  It’s none of my business.  {What she doesn’t know, doesn’t hurt her.} 

Think about it for a minute…  You tell her, she tells him, he hates you, she forgives him, she resents you and then your friendship is over.   It’s as simple as that.

If the guy happens to see you and approaches you trying to give you an explanation.  Stop him and simply say “It’s not my business.”  Make sure to tell him that you didn’t see him.  If he feels guilty enough to tell his wife about his fling then it’s on him and if he tells his wife that he saw you.  Deny it!  It’s none of your business.

I once got into a discussion with a friend about this topic.  She was in shock when I told her that I wouldn’t tell her if her man was cheating.  I told her that it’s not worth ruining a friendship over.  She was confused and upset.  “I thought I was your good friend.” she said,  I said “Yes, you are but when it comes to that I mind my own business.  It’s not my place. How can I tell you something I know nothing about? What if he was having a social lunch with a co-worker? What if he was having dinner with a potential client?  What if it was a cousin or aunt?  I don’t know and why would I plant that seed of doubt in your head.  It’s not my place.  I am truly sorry but I don’t care.”   Needless to say, she was not very happy.

A few personal opinions:

“I did tell a friend before that I knew her husband was cheating, what a bad Idea that was never again.” – Sarah Clift Swinehart

“I would never. This has caused me hypothetical problems with friends. I believe no one should get involved. Let’s say you tell the wife that hubby is stepping out on her. Wife confronts husband. Drama ensues. Then after all the craziness settles down, and wife forgives hubby (it is inevitable) then hubby will the dislike the person who told the wife and that person will be out of a friend. Entre marido y mujer nadie se debe de meter.” – Betty Ruano

“Nope! Because she will believe me and them when she confront him he will say that am a liar and jealous of them, and I will loose her friendship and she will continue with him. Ojos que no ven corazon que no siente!” – Betty Izquierdo

It’s clear to me.  The answer is NO!

Now…

What about those friends that tell you about their indiscretions? How do you handle this? Believe it or not, I have friends who’ve told me they are guilty of having little affairs. ::thinking:: {they are crazy.} Why are they telling me? I don’t want to know – it usually goes in one ear and out the other.  I simply don’t care.  (Don’t worry your secret is still safe.)  I would never be “THAT” person.

If you have friends who tell you everything, and I mean everything.  Just give them the best advice you can even if you disagree with their actions.  Don’t be judgemental.  Everyone makes mistakes but there’s always consequences.

We can agree to disagree…

Until tomorrow… Peace & Love xoxo

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